What is Gangsta-ism? Is there any way I can experience what it's like to be a true gangsta' ass thug? As far as I can tell there aren't any white, Jewish Gangsta thug ma' fuckers from the mountains of Colorado. Perhaps there are some white, Jewish ass gangsta' thug ma' fuckers in the world, but surely none from the mountains of Colorado. Additionally, there may be gangsta thug ass ma' fuckers from the mountains of Colorado, but I can't imagine they're Jewish. So I'd be an anomaly; destined for sheer uniqueness. If I could attain the illusive thug mentality.
I can't really rap, but I'm working on it. I read somewhere that rappers often rap about what they know, how they grew up, the conditions they were raised in, etc. So I could rap about big snow storms and never ending Passover Seders, but does that highlight my gangsta-ism? Most gangstas sell or do drugs, and that's not me. Once I smoked pot and thought I was sneezing out my ass and farting through my nose, but turns out I was just passed out.
Gangsta's also shoot guns. In fact, they don't even shoot guns regularly, they turn them sideways to be extra gangsta. I have trouble not pissing on the toilet seat when I'm in the bathroom, and I'm certainly not holding my dick sideways. Now you want me to shoot a gun sideways? No way.
In short, I guess I need to work on my Gangsta' ass thug Persona. I'm not quite there yet. I want to command respect from my fellow male companions, and have them be like, "Gup is just a true gangsta, straight up thug" ya know? Anyway, it's food for thought. If anyone ever reads this, I'm sure they can give me some input on how to increase my gangsta-ism. Until then, I'll stick with what I know: beard trimmers and acne medication...
